“This is what Zen is about [everything ending]. To have an intimate connection with the world and on top of it to know about its passing. Of course there is sadness. But how sweet. And at the heart of it, what bravery. We know about impermanence, but it does not drive us into a hole. We dare in the face of it to stand up and become intimate and not just with human beings, which is hard enough, but also with the sky, water, chair, butter, cow, and sidewalk. Is this not also the way of the writer?” – Natalie Goldberg, Wild Mind
^^ Another year, another year.
I’m turning Twenty-Four in Nine days (on the Twenty Fourth!) Recently finished the first complete (rough) draft of my first feature length ((?) (or mid-length) (currently @ 50 pages)) screenplay! Current working title is “Innards”. It is to be filmed at night, at dawn, and at the part of mid-morning where the sun is taking up everything – in summer – in New York City and by a wild ocean.
Already 2017. Already May. What I really want to say is
of grass (springtime)
wet & glowing like my pregnant sister in June
take all my skin please
24 Things I’ve Learned in My 24th Year (as pertains to my life) (I impose no lessons on others)
24. How to take apart a bathroom sink, clean it, and put it back together.
23. America is built on evil, and we need to own up to that before anything can truly be repaired.
22. You can fall in love with anyone if you’ve drank enough wine.
21. It’s all pointless unless you do the thing you’re built for.
20. Dead mice are just that. Dead mice. Cockroaches too. I hold my breath and sweep up the remains.
19. The only people who will really care for you are your blood and your friends that are like blood. Hold tight to these people.
18. Go to church even if you don’t believe in God that day, because it’s important to be with familiar faces.
17. Everything brilliant happens in the mornings.
16. You do not have an extra dollar to spare. Just say no.
15. Money is won by doing monotonous things that hurt your soul.
14. ^^Everybody does these things.
13. ^^^Everybody except trust fund babies. You will never be a trust fund baby. Forget that dream.
12. I can never work full-time unless it’s writing/directing. My brain/body won’t do it. Oh well. Time is well worth the poverty. (side note: I know, I know, I probably could if I had to.)
11. Love happens and then fades, people come in and then go – and that’s okay.
10. ^ You are, in the end, all you will always have – and that’s okay.
9. Bike if you live in Brooklyn. There is no other way.
8. Parents don’t last forever. They were your first everything and you were their more than everything. It’s okay to call them everyday. It makes everyone feel better.
7. Coffee will get rid of that sad feeling you have the day after drinking.
6. Alcohol costs the most.
5. Home-cooking meals – really investing in learning how to cook meals is spiritually healthy – your soul craves the tangibility of it.
4. No matter if it never brings me money or never gets read; may I never stop making writing a priority. It is the thing I want to do when I am not doing it.
3. I can be wrong about everything. That’s okay.
2. It’s nice to paint your nails.
1. Keep your expectations low, but work as if they were high.
(extra) 1. Being cool means nothing. Being kind, earnest, and hardworking means something.
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sending all of you love and peace